


Robots and Riot

by Reqpqarx



Category: Homestuck
Genre: F/M, Headcanon, Homestuck - Freeform, SADSTUCK IN LATER CHAPTERS, The trolls are on the meteor, why am i writing this
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-04-08
Updated: 2015-04-30
Packaged: 2018-03-21 20:05:18
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 11
Words: 11,492
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3703707
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Reqpqarx/pseuds/Reqpqarx
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Nepeta is having trouble at the lab with Equius gone, and is waiting for his return when Karkat shows up needing a place to hide (From Equius, what are the odds?) Rated T for language, and some violence and then sadness because you know, it's homestuck. This is totes a headcanon fic I'm writing, while the trolls all live on their meteor and haven't died yet. This is my first fic so tell me what you think, and how it can be better!</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. A Rough Morning

Nepeta POV

Nepeta growled with irritation. She had lain in bed for three hours waiting for Equius to return to the lab. She considered getting on Trollian to contact her beloved moirail, but decided against it. She should be alert. Equius had been testing new robots, and he wanted to see how they developed with a missing part, and left running. _He said he'd be back soon,_ thought Nepeta. She didn't want to go near the bots, since they kind of creeped her out. But then again, so did most of Equius' bots.

She heard a crash outside her room, meaning that the bots were acting up again. Nepeta got up grumpily. As she walked into the lab she noticed the bots were all over the room. Only four bots had been made so far. Tavros bot was chasing Karkat bot. Sollux bot was spasming in the corner, and Equis bot was pouting in the corner. With two missing arms. Equis had tried to kiss his bot, and quite unfortunately it had fought back. Pummeling Equius in the gut repeatedly seemed like good enough evidence to keep the arms off, at least until the blood was in place. She was gonna yell at the bots and start throwing spare parts, but she heard the sound of the transportalizer outside her door. She bounded to the door as fast as she could, and yelled out the door. "Equius, help me! your bots are being simply pawful!" But as she looked out, Equius was not the one to see her at the door. There was another troll, one whom she hadn't been expecting to see for awhile: Karkat.

* * *

**First Chapter done! Let me know what you thought about it! Next chapter will be longer, don't worry.**


	2. The Truth

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Things happen. I refuse to summarize this chapter BLUH.

**Karkat:**

"Okay, what the fuck Nepeta." A series of emotions flashed across her face: disbelief, irritation, surprise, relief, fear, and something else Karkat didn't quite catch. Was it…. Happiness? Never mind. It didn't matter. There were more important matters to tend to. It was giving him a headache to just think about already.

"Oh, sorry Karkitty," Nepeta blushed. "I'm just waiting for Equius to return."

"Uh-huh. Equius has been on quite the journey today. He's been taking everyone's blood, and now he wants mine. I need a place to hide for a bit." Nepeta bit her lip, seemingly nervous.

"Oh, well, uh, sorry. It's kind of impawsible to hide you here. Equius shouldn't have been gone this long. He should be back anytime now. Are you the last troll he needs blood from?"

"Yeah, I am, and he knows I won't tell or show anybody my fucking blood type. I don't know how many times I have to tell him to get off my bulge, he just won't stop. Please, I just need a place to rest and hide for a bit on this stupid meteor." Nepeta hesitated, but obliged.

"I guess I could let you in if you controlled these robots while I wash off. Is that alright?"

"Yeah, I guess so. Why the fuck not." Nepeta quickly smiled, and raced to her room.

**Nepeta**

Nepeta shut her door and hastily washed off. She couldn't stop sweating. She had started perspirating as bad as Equius when she realized Karkat was at the door. _Oh Jegus,_ Nepeta thought. _Karkat is in the lab with me. Alone._ She blushed a fierce green. _Thank Jegus Karkat isn't here to see me like this. Or naked. There's that too. Ah, shut up me. I have important things to do!_ Nepeta successfully shut herself up and finished washing off. As soon as she started to get dressed, she wondered what Equius would think about the situation. Her beloved meowrail would probably kick Karkat out after taking his blood. If he could get the blood in the first place. She finished getting dressed, and sprang out of her room to see how Karkat was doing. _Wait, where is he?_ Nepeta thought. _Where are the bots?_ Nepeta started to panic a bit. She scampered around the lab, but could not find Karkat or the bots. Then she heard a loud CLANG from behind the wall. She noticed the grate was open where she would go to her shipping wall. _My shipping wall! No no no no, Karkat can't see that!_ She flew towards the door. She peeked her head in to find Karkat looking at the wall with a few bots completely silent and speaking to the bots, explaining each part of the wall. _Aww, they're just like little grubs. Karkat's their custodian. :3_ She shook her head. There was no time to think like that. Thank Jegus Karkat hadn't removed all the boxes from the wall, or he would have seen the most embarrassing OTP in all of paradox space.

"Karkitty?" Karkat jumped and whirled around.

"Holy Fuck Nepeta, don't scare me like that! I thought you were Equius for a moment!"

"Oh, I'm sorry, I didn't mean to scare you."

"It's fine. Anyway, this is your shipping wall, huh? These are actually really interesting. I would have never thought to pair some of these idiots together." Nepeta blushed a little.

"Thanks, but can we leave this room? I don't really feel comfortable showing you all of my ships."

"Well, I've pretty much seen them all. Can I just see the one behind those boxes over there? I can see crimson. And it's a big one."

Nepeta blushed fiercely. " No, no, that one is really personal." Karkat raised an eyebrow at that.

"Oh, so you have crimson for someone, huh? Who could they be?" Nepeta blushed so hard her face was green instead of grey.

"No, please, let's just go. I don't want to show that one right now. Maybe another time." Karkat shrugged.

"Alright then, but you will show me later." They walked back into the main room of the lab, the bots trailing behind Karkat. For some reason, the other bots followed Karkat-bot, who must have made himself leader. Nepeta giggled. Karkat looked over at her.

"What's so funny?"

"Your bot made himself the leader, just like during you in the session. What did you do to get Karkat-bot to follow orders?" Karkat rubbed his arm.

"I'm fucking magical, that's how. They follow my perfect leadership."

"Is there something wrong with your arm?" Karkat noticed what he was doing and stopped it; obviously he was hiding something.

"My arm is fucking perfect. Or sorry, _purrfect._ " Nepeta giggled at that, but managed to put her straight face back on.

"All cat puns aside, how did you get your bot to behave? And what's wrong with your arm?" Karkat sighed, and began to explain.

"I transfused my blood into the bot. Viola. He now is me. I promised I'd activate his voice when the blood settled. Do you have any bandages? I don't want my blood to accidentally show to the world." Nepeta looked at Karkat in awe, and a little admiration.

"Yeah, there's some bandages in my room. But how do you know so much about robotics? I thought Equius was the only one."

"Nope. Equius isn't the only one to tinker with robots. I mean, I've got to be good at _something_. I can't only code those viruses like the shitty programmer I am."

"Aww. So I guess that means you don't have to give your blood to Equius anymore. You don't have to hide anymore!"

"Yeah, but I'll need to keep this bot with me. As much as I hate sharing a place with anyone, I don't want Equius to dismantle this guy to see what my blood type is. As much as the guy is trustworthy, he's still really curious. Almost as curious as you."

"Hehe, nobody is as curious as a cat. C'mon, let's get you some bandages." She led Karkat to her room, and sat him down on the floor. In a drawer she got some human gauze-which she had managed to alchemize through many trials and errors-and gray string to hold it together, which Karkat was pretty happy about. He winced, and a little blood spurted from his arm. It seemed to happen in slow motion. Karkat's eyes widened. He looked at Nepeta. His secret was out. _Karkat has red blood,_ Nepeta thought. _So this is why he wouldn't show anyone._

"SHIT!" Karkat scrambled to the back wall. He was absolutely terrified. "Get away from me! I'm a freak! Don't get close to me!" Nepeta had tears in her eyes.

"Karkitty… Please…" He flinched as she crouched beside him. "I don't care about your blood type. It's... Beautiful. You shouldn't be ashamed, especially since the system doesn't work that way anymore. You aren't an outcast. You're Karkat, the leader of our session." Karkat looked up at her.

"Really..? Do you really think that?"

"Yes really, Karkat, I do. You have nothing to be ashamed of. Anyone who make you feel like that is wrong." Karkat looked at Nepeta for a moment, and saw she she wasn't lying.

"Thank you Nepeta… I don't know what to say.."

"How about this: we can go see the shipping wall, and you can see my biggest ship. It's only fair since I learned something big about you today." Karkat smiled weakly.

"Yeah. Let's do that." They walked to the other room. Karkat commanded his bot to stay put for a few minutes. Nepeta shuddered. _Am I ready to show Karkat this part of me?_ She shook off her anxiety, and walked into the shipping room. Together her and Karkat removed the boxes from the wall, one by one. They observed the wall. They stared at a crimson heart enveloping a catlike troll with a blue cap and a troll with nub-like horns. For a few agonizing moments Karkat was silent. Then he turned to her.

"Nepeta… How long have you hidden this?" Nepeta blushed, staring at the floor.

"A couple of sweeps, I never brought myself to actually telling you."

"Look at me." Nepeta did. She saw tender kindness and.. Happiness in his eyes. She was about to say something, probably something stupid, when he interrupted her with a kiss. Nepeta couldn't believe what was happening. _Karkat.._ She thought. And then she kissed him back, not wanting the happiest moment of her life to ever end.


	3. A Mixed Up Day

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Fluff and Lion King and Things that aren't so happy.  
> No I don't summarize properly, get over it.  
> Summaries ruin plots.  
> I hate summaries.

**Equius:**

_Something strange has definitely happened,_ Equius thought. He wasn't quite sure but he would soon find out. _Nepeta had been acting very cagey lately._ She avoided almost all of Equius' questions ever since the day he left the lab to collect blood from the other trolls. Two weeks later and she still wouldn't stop acting suspicious. She wouldn't even help him with his work! He had Equius-bot helping him, but it still wasn't the same as Nepeta. This robotic version of him did not have complicated emotion. He did not know how to program that, nor did he ever think he would learn how. He only knew how to give impressions of attitudes and accurate voice responses. However, there were times when he was with Nepeta, and he thought that with her uplifting spirit and never-give-up attitude, maybe he could figure something out. _I don't want to admit it, but I miss her._ Equius was feeling rather downcast. With Nepeta always rushing off, it seemed like she was always busy. Just a few hours ago she ran off, yelling about meeting with Kanaya and Terezi and Karkat and Sollux. She just seemed so _**busy**_ that it was almost like she didn't want him to be his moirail anymore. _No._ Equius thought. _She's just busy. It's nothing, she's just being a better friend to the others_. Even thinking so, Equius wanted to know what exactly had caused this. As Nepeta's moirail, he should be straightforward and talk to her about it. Maybe he would contact her via Trollian to talk, since she was gone. Yeah, that sounded like a good idea. But not until Equius finished the robotic arms he was making. He had been so distracted by his thoughts he had failed to hear Equius-bot whirring and whinnying warnings about the mistakes he was making on the arms. _Lucky robot._ Equius thought. _I wish I could whinny like a beautiful stallion_. He fixed and finished his work, switched Equius-bot off, and walked dejectedly to the computer.

**Nepeta:**

"Sorry Equius! I can't stay, I'll be late! I'll tell you about it later!" Nepeta rushed outside the lab away from a startled, confused Equius. Grinning like a child, she raced down the halls. "Aaahhh, I'm sooo late. Karkat's gonna kill me!" But when she made it to his place, his face light up. He wasn't mad, he didn't even shout or speak like he usually would. He seemed to radiate pure joy. It made Nepeta so happy to know that Karkat wasn't mad at her that bounded towards him and tackle-pounced him, causing them both to tumble and crash on the floor. Oh, Nepeta hadn't done that in so long, and it was so much fun! Karkat stared at Nepeta, completely shocked. Then he laughed. Pure, mirthful laughter that resonated through the floors. Not his usual sarcastic laugh, but one that would make Equius cry, it was so beautiful. They got up, their foreheads pressed together. They stared into each other's eyes for a moment, not speaking or moving. They broke apart, grinning like idiots, and walked inside Karkat's apartment.

"What did you have planned for us today Karkitty?"

"Ah, just some places on this meteor you haven't seen. And a movie. A stupid Earth movie, but I think you'll like it nonetheless." Nepeta perked up at the mention of a movie, even if she didn't really like many Earth films.

"What's this movie called? And where exactly are we going?" Karkat bopped her on the nose, causing her to blush a bright green.

"It's a surprise, Nepeta! C'mon, it'll be fun."

"Oh, alright then. Lead the way, leader." Karkat looked at her as if to say: _I'm not the leader of the session anymore._ He took her to the transportalizer, and mumbled something incomprehensible. The pad took them to a dim-light room. Karkat clapped, once, twice. Suddenly the room was illuminated brightly with several incredibly bright lights. It took Nepeta a minute to get her bearings. This room was really big. It was a little bigger than the lab and it's surrounding rooms put together. Wow. And there were scattered objects: A ring of computers, another transportalizer, and a pile of horns. "Awww, Karkitty, you really want bigger horns don't you?" Karkat blushed a crimson red, then tried to cover it up, then realized who he was with. Habits die hard.

"So what if I do? It's not gonna happen, is it?" Nepeta frowned.

"Awe, c'mon, your horns will grow out. It just needs some time." Karkat chuckled a bit at that, and walked over to the horn pile.

"I've given up on that happening. Anyway, I brought you here for a movie. Karkat punched the wall, and a small button appeared a few feet away. He punched that too. Suddenly the room rumbled. The wall opened up, and a large screen popped up.

"Wow." Nepeta was breathless. "This is incredible. Did you make this yourself?"

"Hell yeah I made this. Who else has the absolute genious to do this themselves?"

"Ummm, Sollux, Equius, and Aradia?" Karkat gave her a look.

"Alright, point taken. Anyway, I made this for when I didn't feel like dealing with all the trolls and their judgemental movie-hating minds. Especially Vriska. She's the worst of them all. But I have a movie for you anyway. It's called the Lion King." Nepeta seemed pretty interested in that title. Because it was so royal, and because **LIONS**. They ended up spending almost three hours watching the hour-and-a-half movie, due to Nepeta crying, Karkat's explaining, and rewatching several parts. Nepeta absolutely loved it. Nepeta snuggled up to Karkat the whole time. He wasn't complaining. Nepeta drew a bit on the walls about Simba and Nala, and Rafiki, the wisest baboon that ever existed. After Nepeta calmed down (this took awhile), Karkat asked her what she would like to do. She was about to respond when she got a message from Equius.

CentaursTesticle started trolling arsenicCatnip

CT: D → Nepeta.

CT: D → Nepeta, please answer.

CT: D → Where are you?

aC: :33 *ac apologizes because she left her laptop off to her right.*

CT: D → I forgive you.

aC: :33 What do you need?

CT: D → I would like to talk to you, but alone.

CT: D → Come back to the lab. We need to talk.

aC: :33 Oh, alright. I'll be back ofurr in five minutes.

CT: D → Thank you.

CentaursTesticle ceased trolling arsenicCatnip

Nepeta frowned. _What could possibly be wrong with Equius?_ She didn't know, but as his moirail, it was her job to keep him emotionally stable. "Hey, Karkitty?"

"Yeah?"

"I have to go. Equius needs me right now. He is in need of some moirail help." Karkat frowned, but didn't object.

"I have to troll the John human as well, I guess. I think I might be setting up a memo later. I'm not entirely sure, but I think so. If I don't, then I'll message you later, okay?"

"Okay then, have fun with the John human!"

"It's not as fun as you think!" Karkat yelled as Nepeta ran off. She stepped on the transportalizer, and returned to the lab. Equius was waiting for her outside the door, a sad expression on his face. He had only a few words to say.

"Hey, I don't know what I did, but I'm sorry."


	4. Future Meetings?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Okay so this chapter is short and it sucks. It's pretty much a pesterlog.

As soon as Nepeta had left, Karkat sighed, disappointed. He was hoping she'd stay a bit longer. He cleaned up the room, except for the horn pile. He still liked it, and occasionally, he'd lay down in it. It was surprisingly comfortable for a pile of horns. Karkat would have gotten on the computer, but he was much too tired after cleaning (being the lazy-ass that he was) and the horn pile was beckoning to him. He lay down on the pile. _Ahhh,_ Karkat thought. _Is this what it's like to not be mad all the time?_ He pondered what he liked better. He shrugged it off. It didn't really matter right now. He had shit to accomplish. He got on the computer, and logged onto Trollian. He was almost instantly barraged with messages from Vriska. _Ugh._ He thought. _Why now? I have important business to attend._ He tried to ignore the messages but she didn't stop messaging him.

"AUGH, OKAY YOU WIN! I'LL RESPOND!" Karkat almost punched his computer. He opened up the message tab.

ArachnidsGrip started trolling CarcinoGenecist

AG: Heeeeeeeey Karkat

AG: Heeeeeeeey

AG: Seriously, where are you? I have important news.

AG: C'mon Karkat, I need to talk to you.

AG I know you're online 8uddy.

AG: Kaaaaaaaarkat

CG: WHAT THE FUCK DO YOU WANT.

AG: Ah! there you are! Gr8 to see you respond!

AG: I was a8out to give up!

CG: I HAVE IMPORTANT MATTERS TO DEAL WITH.

CG: MAKE THIS QUICK.

AG: Jeez, fine.

AG: I had a wonderful conversation with my future self.

CG: DON'T GIVE A FUCK.

AG: Hey! I wasn't done explaining! ::::(

CG: FINE. CONTINUE.

AG: Okay, so as I was saying, I was talking to my future self.

AG: She refused to say too much a8out what she was doing, but she did say that I needed to pass you a message.

CG: WHY COULDN'T YOUR FUTURE SELF JUST BOTHER ME?

AG: 8ecause, your future self told her not to.

AG: I don't understand why she would listen, but anyway, this message is from your future self.

CG: WHY THE FUCK WOULDN'T HE JUST MESSAGE ME.

AG: Apparently he is doing something nice. Like he doesn't want to bother you because something gr8 happened that day or something.

AG: I'm not sure, and frankly don't care.

CG: OH. SO I AM CONSIDERATE IN THE FUTURE. HEH.

AG: Aaaaaaaanyway, I have a message for you.

AG: Don't forget the silver box in the far corner, and start a memo soon.

CG: OH SHIT! THE BOX!

CG: THAT WAS REALLY IMPORTANT HOW THE EVERLIVING FUCK DID I FORGET!

CG: AAAUGH. BUT WAIT, WHAT DO YOU MEAN DANGER?

CG: OBVIOUSLY THERE'S SOMETHING PRETTY FUCKING BIG IF YOU LISTEN TO ME.

AG: 8eats me. Trust me, I've pried, but she won't give me a br8.

AG: Anyway, memo's in 30 minutes. This is really important Karkat.

CG: OKAY, THANK YOU.

AG: Catch you l8r. ::::D

CG: GOOD BYE.

ArachnidsGrip ceased trolling CarcinoGenecist


	5. Moirail Madness

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Nepeta tells Equius.

**Nepeta**

Nepeta stared at Equius in surprise. She had no idea what he was talking about, but she automatically noticed that her hair was a mess and she left her hat with Karkat, in whatever-that-room-is-called. Maybe the secret lab. Ooh, that sounded mysterious. _Focus._ Nepeta thought. _My meowrail is in trouble and needs my help._

"Equius? What's wrong?" Equius stood up straight, but his shoulders shook, not staying in a **strong** position like usual. He didn't say anything for a minute. But then he asked her to come inside, he wasn't comfortable with speaking outside the lab. He opened the door, and walked inside sullenly. Nepeta hugged him from behind, and guided him to the robot pile. She couldn't help but to think of Karkat's horn pile, and Vriska's pile of magic 8 balls. They all represented each individual's failures. The thought made her sad. One moment later the two collapsed on the horn pile, and began to talk.

**Equius:**

As soon as Nepeta showed up at the door, Equius tried his best to look strong. _Project yourself._ He thought. _Stand tall._ He could tell Nepeta wasn't fooled by his act. She had a worried look on her face. He didn't show it, but Equius was really happy to see she had at least some form of concern for him still. They walked inside, and then then Nepeta hugged him from behind, leading them to the robot pile. They collapsed on the horn pile, and stared at each other. Equius was thankful for his dark glasses, they covered his expression pretty well. He wasn't sure if it would be okay for her to see the full extent of his anguish. Neither Nepeta nor Equius moved for a moment. All was still, neither side budging. Then Nepeta nodded, signaling Equius to speak. The two had the system that worked perfectly that way. Having been moirails long enough, they had developed a system. Not speaking until the listener was fully attentive and serious. Ironic that Equius was still following this system, thinking that Nepeta wanted a new moirail. He wasn't sure how he would get through this talk, but he sucked it up and started small.

"So I've taken notice about you going out very often of late. And yes, I know I shouldn't be worrying about that. But I just don't feel right when you run off so much like that. As your moirail and friend, I worry about you." Nepeta smiled.

"Oh Equius, you shouldn't be worrying about me! I've been absolutely wonderful!"

"Yes, I quite figured that part out. But what's been making you so overjoyed lately? I know you avoid the high bloods and the ocean dweller, and I can definitely guarantee you haven't just been with Aradia and Kanaya for two weeks, and not tell me anything." Nepeta flinched.

"W-what are you stalking about?"

"Nepeta. Please. I don't want to play any games, or pretend I am stronger than I really am to get through this conversation." Nepeta looked slightly panicked.

"I-I'm not sure I can say." Equius shook his head dejectedly. _**I knew it,**_ he muttered under his breath. Nepeta looked over at him, still slightly panicked, and Equius cut to the chase.

"Nepeta…. Do you want to end our moirallegiance and start one with someone else?" Nepeta looked at Equius, horrified.

"What?! No, of course I don't! Equius, why would you think that?" Equius turned away, lifted his glasses and wiped his eyes. Turning back to Nepeta, he began to explain.

"You're never around, and you never tell me anything. You don't care for your bot, always keeping it on standby mode or dismissing it to do something trivial you don't want to do." Equius pressed on. "Also, you never seem to care enough to stay around me for more than twenty minutes. Please forgive me, but all I can think of is that you want to be rid of me." Nepeta jumped up.

"Equius, no! That's not at all what I want, you're an excellent moirail, and I would never replace you! I haven't been looking for anyone else at all!" Equius paused. The gears in his head started turning.

"Then… What have you been doing?" Equius sat dumbfounded.

"I… Oh, I wanted to keep this secret for a while. Well, I've been hanging out with Karkitty for a while now.." Equius' expression of sadness that had whipped to confusion shifted into shock, concern, and disbelief.

"If I recall properly, that is still the troll you are flushed for?" Nepeta blushed for a moment, and nodded.

"I've been trying to figure out when to tell you, but Karkitty is now my matesprit." All sound and movement stopped. Equius' expression was so priceless that Nepeta giggled a little bit. It stopped being funny when a minute later Equius still hadn't moved; Nepeta couldn't even tell if he was breathing. Equius sat there, not comprehending. "Uhh, Equius?" A second later Equius looked at her.

" **HIM**?!" Equius jumped up from the pile, hands in his hair, sticking it up in all directions. He ran across the room, smashed a robot in one punch, and ran around the room. _Is this Equius' form of fangirling?_ Nepeta thought, giggling to herself. Equius realized he was making a scene, and apologized. "Forgive me. I have been rather out of character."

"Oh no no, I am sorry fur making you worry and lion to you. But do you understand why I didn't want to say anything, at least for now?" Equius sighed, and nodded.

"Yes, I understand. All the same, I worried about you. I was rather blue thinking about the possibilities." Nepeta hugged him tight, and Equius ruffled Nepeta's hair.

"Oh! My cap!" Nepeta realized that it was still with karkat. "Equius, do you mind if get my cap from Karkat?" Equius nodded, smiling. "Thank you!" Nepeta started to rush out the door, but remembered something. "Wait, Equius, before I go, what do you think of Karkat being my matesprit?" Equius' smile faded. He thought for a moment.

"Well, if he treats you properly, then there's no argument on my end. Now go find your cap. And there's a memo in about five minutes. I don't remember completely, but I think you were with Karkat at the time it was made. Just.. Show up later tonight, okay? I want to show you some things I've been working on the past two weeks." Nepeta grinned. "Thank you Equius!" Equius watched fondly as Nepeta ran off to speak to Karkat.

* * *


	6. Fearful Memos

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A memo.  
> Future Karkat is mean.

Karkat cradled a silver box no bigger than his palm in his arms, sighing. He had completely forgotten about his gift to Nepeta. Shuffling quietly to his computer, he grumbled. _Stupid._ He'd gone through a lot of trouble and even more grist to make this gift for Nepeta, and he _forgot._ _Seriously, how stupid can one be?_ Karkat punched himself in the side of the head, and huffed. He hated making gifts in the first place. They almost always turned to shit, as he was worthless trash at gift-making. However, with help from his robot, Karkat made a gleaming necklace of silver, designed with cats on the necklace. He knew she would love it. His robot version really did most of the work. Equius had built it exceptionally well, even if it was a bit eccentric and built a shit load of weapons for no reason all the time. Most of the times it was just scythes. Karkat had to throw them into paradox space, there were so many. It was as if the robot had wanted to have his own pile of scythes, like Gamzee and his clown horns. Ugh. Karkat hated that stupid pile. There was no reason for it. Gamzee liked to lay in it, but it wasn't even remotely comfortable. Karkat shook his head. _Stop sidetracking, idiot!_ Karkat reached his computer and started typing.

CURRENT CarcinoGeneticist [CCG] opened up a memo at ?:?

CCG: ALRIGHT, EVERYONE.

CCG: THIS IS IMPORTANT SHIT I'M DROPPING ON YOU GUYS

CCG: I NEED EVERYONE TO STOP WHATEVER THEY ARE DOING AND JUST LISTEN. I DON'T CARE WHAT IT IS, JUST PAY ATTENTION.

CURRENT GrimAutralix [CGA] responded to memo

CGA: Karkat, I'm a bit preoccupied right now. What do you need?

FUTURE CarcinoGeneticist [FCG] responded to memo 42 hours from now

FCG: EVERYONE. SERIOUSLY. THIS ISN'T A JOKE, THERE IS INCREDIBLE DANGER AWAITING YOU ALL VERY SOON.

CURRENT CuttlefishCuller [CCC] responded to memo

CCC: Karkat, )(ow are any of us supposed to believe t)(at you aren't making a reely bad joke?

CCC: -Especially since most of your memos )(ave been pretty outrageous.

FCG: DAMMIT. IT'S NOT MY FAULT PAST AND FUTURE ME'S CAN'T GET ALONG.

FCG: WHAT WILL IT TAKE TO MAKE YOU BELIEVE ME? ANYTHING.

FCG: JUST NAME YOUR FUCKING PRICE.

PAST CentaursTesticle [PCT] responded to memo 10 hours ago

PCT: You could try to stop using such foul language.

CCG: FUCK THAT.

CURRENT CarcinoGeneticist [CCG] banned PAST CentaursTesticle from responding to memo.

FCG: FINE! SHUT UP PAST ME I'LL DO WHAT I CAN.

CGA: Um.. I don't mean to interrupt, but what exactly is going on?

FCG: IF IT GETS YOU TO BELIEVE ME THEN WHATEVER.

CCC: Wow, it may actually be possible for Karkrab not to swear! 38D

CCG: AUGH. FUTURE ME, JUST EXPLAIN WHAT NEEDS EXPLAINING.

FCG: WAIT, BEFORE I SAY ANYTHING, I NEED TO KNOW IF EVERYONE IS HERE.

FCG: C'MON, I NEED EVERYONE TO RESPOND RIGHT NOW.

CURRENT adiosToreador [CAT] responded to memo

CAT: uHHH, HERE?

CGA: Hello

CCC: )(-Ere!

CCG: HERE.

CURRENT twinArmageddons [CTA] responded to memo

CTA: Here.

CURRENT caligulasAquarium [CCA] responded to memo

CCA: Here.

CURRENT terminallyCapricious responded to memo

CTC: mOtHeRfUcKiNg HeRe.

CURRENT arachnidsGrip [CAG] responded to memo

CAG: Oh 8rother, I'm l8. What'd I miss?

CURRENT apocalypseArisen [CAA] responded to memo

CAA: here

CURRENT gallowsCalibrator [CGA] responded to memo

CGC: here!

CURRENT centaursTesticle responded to memo

CCT: Hello.

CCG: OH FUCK WHERE'S NEPETA.

FCG: DON'T WORRY ABOUT HER. SHE'S SAFE FOR NOW.

CCT: I sent her back to you. I must inform you I know the secret you're hiding, but nobody else does.

Karkat flinched. He began to sweat. Equius knew his blood color? Knowing him, Equius would probably lose all respect for Karkat as a leader and a troll. Oh, what was he going to do? Karkat was beginning to panic. _Oh wait._ Karkat thought. _Important memo._ He turned back to his computer, and read where he left off.

CCT: I must say, I am e%eptionally impressed you were able to hide this for quite so long.

CGA: I still am confused as to what this memo is about.

FCG: OKAY THAT'S ENOUGH. PAST ME, IT'S NOT WHAT YOU THINK IT IS, STOP PANICKING. AND KANAYA, I AM HERE TODAY TO WARN ALL OF YOU.

FCG: YOU ARE ALL BEING HUNTED. THERE'S NOT MUCH TIME, AND YOU ARE ALL IN GRAVE DANGER.

CTA: KK, thii2 i2n't funny. The2e memo2 have ju2t become joke2 for everyone.

FUTURE adiosToreador responded to memo 42 hours from now

FAT: wELL, UHH, I CAME HERE TO VERIFY, UH, THAT KARKAT IS TELLING THE TRUTH. wE REALLY CANNOT AFFORD TO HAVE EVERYONE ON COMPUTERS RIGHT NOW, SO PLEASE JUST BELIEVE US.

CAA: 0kay then, I for one can trust Tavr0s, he never lies.

FAT: wHY THANK YOU.

CTC: YeAh My MoThErFuCkInG bRoThEr. :0)

CCC: Okay then, Karkrab, w)(at do you want to tell us?

FCG: HOLD ON, MY PAST SELF SEEMS TO BE PANICKING.

FCG: HEY! OVER HERE!

CCG: SORRY, I GOT DISTRACTED.

FCG: UH-HUH. ANYWAY, YOU ARE ALL BEING HUNTED DOWN. WITHIN TWO HOURS YOU WILL ALL BE UNDER ATTACK. BY THEN WE WILL NEED TO ALL BE IN A SECRET COMPUTER LAB.

CCG: WHY SHOULD I REVEAL THE ONLY ROOM I CAN HAVE PRIVACY IN?

FCG: BECAUSE, IDIOT, WE HAVE NO CHOICE. DO YOU KNOW ANY OTHER SECRET ROOMS? NEPETA WILL ARRIVE IN A MINUTE, AND YOU AND HER WILL NEED TO GATHER AND LEAD EVERYONE TO THAT ROOM.

CAG: Ooh, a secret room :::;)

CCG: SHUT THE FUCK UP. THIS IS SERIOUS.

FAT: uHH, I'M GONNA GO NOW… i NEED TO HELP FIX OUR DEFENSES.

CCA: Wwell, this has been an interesting turn of evvents.

CCA: Howw do you plan on getting us to this secret computer lab?

CGA: Yes, I am especially interested in finding out how we are to find this room.

Suddenly the transportalizer activated, and a dark form leapt towards Karkat. Karkat screamed.

"OH FUCK DON'T KILL ME IT'S TOO EARLY! WHAT DID I DO WRONG?!" The dark shape above him hesitated, and tilted its head to the side. A silky voice spoke to him, and he instantly recognized it as Nepeta.

"Karkitty, what's wrong? And why are all the lights off?" Karkat cried a little.

"Jegus fuck Nepeta, don't scare me like that." Karkat was shaking pretty badly. "I-I can't answer your question right now. Just get on the memo, all your answers are there." Nepeta settled into the computer next to Karkat's, and opened up Trollian.

**Nepeta**

When Nepeta transportalized into the secret lab, she noticed Karkat by his computer, suddenly tensed up. She could almost _smell his fear_. She shrugged it off and decided to give her matesprit a playful pounce. When she did, however, he immediately shoved her off and backed up to a wall, shaking. Something was bugging him, but he told her to just get on the memo. She was a little hurt, but understood something had really scared Karkat. So she opened up a computer, and logged onto Trollian. She read to the last point Karkat had read, and saw a load of "where are you's" and "Karkat, respond."

CGA: Yes, I am especially interested in finding out how we are to find this room.

FCG: I HAVE TO GO. GOOD LUCK PAST ME. I PROBABLY WON'T BE ABLE TO SAY ANYTHING FOR AWHILE.

CCC: Wait, before you go, w)(at is hunting us?

FCG: YOUR BOTS. GOOD BYE.

CAG: Well I guess we'll have to rely on our Karkat to resolve this issue.

CAG: 8y the way, where is he?

CTC: mOtHeRfUcKeR, WhErE ArE YoU.

CAT: y-YEAH, WHERE ARE YOU?

CTA: KK, you 2aiid your2elf we don't have any tiime. Respond already.

CURRENT arsenicCaptnip [CAC] responded to memo

CAC: :33 Sorry, I accidently scared him.

CAC: :33 I don't think he'll get up for another minute or so.

CAG: Gr8 jo8, now get him up. We need him to explain where we're going.

CAC: :33 *ac doesn't want to bother Karkitty*

CCA: Wwell you'vve got to get over that. If we're running out of time, then get him on this memo.

CAC: :33 *ac reluctantly agrees. She will return in a moment*

Nepeta rose from her computer, and turned to Karkat.

"Hey, I'm really sorry. I feel pawful fur scaring you, and I'll try to be more careful. I don't want to make you mad or anything. Are you okay? Beclaws if you aren't then-" Nepeta was interrupted by Karkat holding up his right palm. He rose, and embraced Nepeta tightly. She was surprised by this, but returned his hug and stood there for a moment holding him. "Karkitty?" She looked up at him. Karkat's eyes were still a bit terrified, but he seemed a little better.

"I made you a gift. Over by my computer in the grey box." Nepeta raised an eyebrow at that, but walked over and picked it up. There was a beautiful silver necklace inside, with cat charms all over it. She squealed a little bit, and tackled Karkat with a hug, and crashed to the floor. She buried her face in his neck and mumbled, "It's beautiful." Karkat smiled a bit. "You like it?" He asked. Nepeta looked at him.

"I love it." Karkat smiled. Today was quite the day. Karkat smiling? Giving gifts? Mood swings?

"Well I guess it's about time for me to give everyone instructions, huh? Let's go find out what our doom is." And on that happy note, the two walked over to their respective computers and started typing.


	7. Robo-stuck!

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> POV for Karkat-bot. Just what you need.

**Karkat Bot:**

You are now Karkat-Bot. You don't want to deal with that third person shit. You like the original Homestuck style. Fourth wall? What's that? Oh, the knee-high mound of plastic bricks? You are so disgusted with that you don't even want to think about it.

_Karkat-bot: check strife specibi._

You check your strife **specibus** , knowing that you have only one. Now that you think of it, is it possible to own more than one? You ponder this for a moment, only to realize that it is pointless and you would never swap another weapon for your perfect sickles. And you are a robot. A dangerous, mechanical, athletically efficient vessel. You like to think yourself much better than who you were modeled after: that weak, stupid, secretive, cowardly asshole. Gog, you want to kill him. The only thing that idiot gets right is hating himself. He's worthless.

_Stop hating Karkat this instant._

You blatantly refuse this notion at once. You will always hate Karkat. But you _do_ have important matters to deal with.

_View your surroundings._

You take a look around you. You are in a small rectangular room, fit with some form of a glowy coffin and a chain on the wall. Equius-bot is trying to figure out how the coffin works, while Tavros-bot relaxes on the coffin's green-glowing surface. You are sitting down in the far corner. Hmm. This spot needs a computer or a desk. You need a better spot to plan and/or brood. This place is too small for your liking. You scowl, disgusted. This meteor isn't big enough for both the bots and the trolls. This **room** isn't big enough for the three of you.

Be the other girl.

You cannot be a girl, robots technically aren't cis beings. Nor is Karkat-bot a representation of a girl. This thought angers you, (Karakat-bot) and you might attack the apparently omniscient reader. Wherever he or she may be. You drop it for now.

Fine. Be the robot girl.

You are now Vriska-bot, and you are incredibly bored. It's almost like you're dead and the afterlife has nothing new to offer. Not that you would know what that's like. Just a thought.

Vriska-bot: Think about today's events.

You reflect upon the day, not having anything better to do. You go back to the morning, when you had been reactivated by Vriska. You two spent a couple of early hours sparring and improving on dice rolling technique, when, being a robot, your skill and precision made you better off at rolling a helpful hand. You ended up learning a lot those few hours and so did Vriska. You two became decent pals, even though you didn't speak to her.

That was a general rule of the bots: no speaking to the trolls. Though you broke the rules and telepathically spoke to her. It was kind of odd, hanging around another version of you. Being the rebel you are, you had to talk to the other you.

She was somewhat annoying at first, but having another you has it's quirks. Not like there's anything to hide. No need to read each others' minds. It was like a constant deja vu and you didn't like it, not one bit. But other you was pretty great, anyway. After all, it is pretty great to be you. You both made a pact not to speak of their conversations to each other, for obvious reasons. You were given a choice by Vriska, to be deactivated or not. You hadn't given it much thought, but you instantly said yes to staying activated. Biiiiiiiig mistake. Vriska went off to do whatever it was she was doing, which was probably just pissing everyone else off. Ah, it was great to be you. But, unfortunately, you could not do that. Maybe you would visit Tavros-bot.

Now, if only you knew where to find him…. This could be difficult, or maybe he's just with other Tavros. Most likely the case. In fact, those two were probably role-playing and becoming bros this very moment. The thought disgusted you. The only other troll who would possibly break the rules and talk to their troll, ironically, would be Tavros.

Well, then there's Aradia. She's an exception to this rule. Nobody, not even Karkat-bot expected her to fight. There was something special about her, almost like being dead and robotic was what she was meant to be. You don't know, and frankly, you don't care. Aradia had always pissed you off in a way that-

Get back on topic

Excuse me, that is impossible, as you are thinking. There is nothing to be on topic about.

Fine. Just think more about what happened today.

After Vriska left the room, you sat there wondering. Karkat-bot planned to lead everyone to kill off the trolls and deal with the universe their troll versions had created. All the trolls had done was argue and mess around after the universe was made. Karkat-bot was pretty angry that the trolls were so stupid and could never get anything done, but hey, that's his problem, not yours. You don't care much for fighting your troll sister. Yeahhhhhhhh, sisters for life.

This made you think about the other trolls. Who else didn't want to fight? Tavros-bot wasn't much of a fighter. And he probably already made peace with his troll brother. Yeah, that was much better than 'troll versions.' You already know Aradia-bot won't fight. Hmmm. Feferi-bot wasn't too keen on violence, but her motives were questionable. When she gets mad, who knows what she'll do. Gamzee-bot. Oh, that's definitely someone who would fight. Being a robot, he was immune to all forms of drugs. That would kill the peace in him. Who knows how violent he would get.

You were about to think about everyone else when suddenly the door burst open, and Vriska stormed in. She ignored your questioning look, and slumped down in front of her computer. You didn't get up and walk to her. You simply waited. She didn't move, and you realized she had fallen asleep in tears. You sighed, and simply carried her over to the couch. She was completely out. You considered leaving a note telling her to explain what she was crying about, and to reactivate you in the morning, but you decided against that. Besides, there was no guarantee she'd even activate you anyway. She wouldn't be ready to say anything. You could tell. After all, she is you. You decided to sit here and keep watch for anyone else for the night. After all, you did not require sleep. But it was really boring. And now here you are, sitting here and waiting for morning. Until there is a pounding on the door.

Vriska-Bot: Answer door.

You jump up, and run to the door. There's no way you're gonna let some asshole wake up your sister. You open the door to see every robot at your front door except Aradia-bot.

Vriska-Bot: Close door behind you and yell at Karkat-bot.

As tempting as that sounds, you have to make sure your Troll-sister stays asleep. From one Vriska to another, right? You turn to the group, and ask in your most irritated voice possible: "What do you want."

Be Karkat-bot.

You are now the leader of the robot-trolls. Congratulations. You are standing in front of Vriska's room pounding on the door when it opens much quicker than you expected it to. Vriska-bot is still activated. Good. You are about to speak, when she angrily looks at you and, with her bitchiest, most irritated voice, says: 'What do you want.'

Karkat-bot: Explain what is going on

You glare at Vriska-bot.

"The jig is up. All the trolls know of our plans. They are already beginning to defend themselves, and we have to attack now." She just looks at you.

"Where are we going." Her tone is flat, and she seems slightly determined. Haha, she's protecting the fake-Vriska past the door.

"You aren't fooling anyone with that bullshit facade. The Vriska in the room is a fake. She duplicated herself for a few hours to trick you." Vriska-bot's face contorts in confusion, and sudden realization. Her fists clench.

"Where are we going?" You smile gruesomely.

"To a hidden laboratory."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey, I do love ruining the trust of characters between each other. I also like a good killing off of characters. (jk I'll try not to kill people off.)


	8. Chapter 8

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Small plot things, boring chapter you're welcome.

Be Nepeta

Congratulations, you are now Nepeta, and you are currently blocking off a network of entrances in the vents. You wish you had some help, but you are the only one who would be willing to do this kind of work. Nobody else can stand the claustrophobia that they experience in the vents. Make it two people, and not even you can handle it. Sighing, you open up your sylladex, and withdraw the camouflage walls that Sollux and Equius worked together on.

They are so great at making things, you wish they would stop their hatred and rivalry for each other over Aradia. They would make a wonderful kismesis, you think. It's hard, being a shipper. It's hard, and nobody understands.

You sigh, and look at the pathways you've already blocked off. You are painfully reminded that you may never go back through these vents ever again.

No. You think. You will not tolerate that kind of thinking. You let off a mighty hmph! and go along with the rest of your task. Only four more pathways. You are getting a little tired of this chore. You wish you could go back and see Equius and Karkat, those two were the only two who really mattered to you at the moment. Soon enough everyone would know about you and Karkat, just like Equius did. You didn't mind. In fact, you think it would be really fun to see everyone's reactions! That thought cheers you up a little bit.

Nepeta: Finish your job

You quickly crawl to the last corridor and reach into your sylladex to pull out the last wall, when ahead of you you see your make eye contact. Neither of you moves. Then, Nepeta-bot twitched her… tail? When did she get a tail? You think, surprised. I wish I had a real tail. Nepeta-bot twitches it in a pattern that you recognize as a peace offering. You relax, and lean against the wall to your right. For a moment, neither of you speak. Then you speak up, and start with a simple question.

"Hello. Are you here alone?" Your bot stays still for another moment, but then apparently makes a decision and sticks with it.

"Lucky fur both of us, yes." Your eyes widen. You had never heard one of the bots speak. You had assumed they were all mute.

"How is it that you can speak? I thought all of the bots were mute." Nepetabot shakes her head.

"In that case mew are mistaken. All of us can speak, it's just a general rule that we aren't allowed to speak to our troll selves."

"So then you're breaking the rules?"

"Yes, purrhaps I am. Maybe I don't like their plans. Maybe I feel that what the rest of us are doing is wrong."

"So then why do you still associate with them?"

"Beclaws I don't want them to turn on me. I was actually secretly hoping to find you here. They sent me ahead to scout the vents, and I was going to go back without any results." This surprises you. You had not been expecting this. Then again, you didn't know what to expect. You both sit there for a minute. Your bot waits expectantly for your answer. And you smile.

"Want to hang around here every day?"

Be karkat in third person

Karkat sat in the corner of the room, thinking about what was gonna happen next. He had a plan, yes, but the robots had a robot version of him, probably smarter and capable of a counter-plan.

Karkat sighed. When was Nepeta getting back? He didn't even care about the others knowing about them. Even if only one person found out -other than Equius- then it would spread like wildfire. Well, actually, it was only one big room, so it wouldn't matter much. Everyone would find out at once, or within a day.

Reluctantly he had agreed before that someone stealthy would have to alchemize food and things to entertain them all. After all, they were hoping to withstand an assault and then destroy the bots.

Karkat wondered what he was going to accomplish that day, when he looked at his crab-watch. It was almost time to be future karkat that past karkat was indebted to. Karkat groaned. There wasn't any time for this. There were plans to be made, defenses to set and fix, and food to be eaten. However, he owed it to the him in five minutes still. Karkat wrinkled his nose in disgust, but called over Tavros and began to respond to past Karkat's memo.


	9. Forget Chapter Title Nine, I don't know what to put here and so I'm making you read this unneccessarily long chapter title, you're welcome.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A simple bet~  
> A happy moment~  
> A scary moment~  
> Enjoy the fact that nothing bad happens :D

Be Vriska.

Congratulations, you are now the all-powerful spidertroll. And right now you're incredibly bored. So much so that you almost want to join in on the fun that Sollux and Feferi are having playing wiggler games. Almost. Right now, you are simply leaning against the wall with a facade of simple nostalgia. Everyone knows better than to interrupt you if you are reliving old memories. They all know that you'll come to them. You look over to the right, seeing Terezi bothering Karkat. He keeps pushing her away, and restraining his yelling. Sooner or later he was gonna flip his shit, which would be some fun to see.

You smirk a little bit when a troll appears at your shoulder saying

"How long do you think it'll take until he blows up?" You whirl around, and see that it's just Nepeta, grinning cheerfully. You relax.

"I give him two more minutes." Nepeta giggles and whispers in your ear (which normally you would have been pissed about, but you restrain yourself)

"He's gonna blow up in one minute, no more." You raise an eyebrow at that. You look at her and raise a bet.

"How does one million boondollars sound?" You and Nepeta shook on it.

Be Nepeta fifty-five seconds later

**5 seconds**

You and Vriska watch intently as Terezi got way too close for Karkat's comfort.

**4 seconds**

Terezi leans in really close

**3 seconds**

Karkat backs up

**2 seconds**

Terezi blocks off all means of escape. Karkat looks terrified.

**1 second**

Terezi licks Karkat's face. He shudders, with pleasure or with rage is unknown at the moment.

**0 seconds.**

Karkat stood up as tall as he could, and lost it. He **exploded.** He started shouting loud, and this wasn't usual Karkat loud, this was _**loud.**_ Terezi backed up. For a moment, you think Terezi is about to cry. Then you forgo any common sense and tackle Karkat.

He stares at you, unbelieving. Then he blinks. One enormous breath escapes his lips. You realize that you're sitting on his chest and kiss his forehead. You get up, and help Karkat to his feet.

Looking around, you realize everyone is staring at you two. Oops. That wasn't exactly how you had planned on letting everyone know you two were matesprits. You are a little bit embarrassed, but that's nothing compared to when Karkat grabs your hand and yells _'What are you fuckasses looking at huh?'_ Everyone else quite uncomfortably went back to whatever they were doing. Terezi sniffed. "So. You two are together, huh." Karkat looked at her, and you clung to him.

"Yeah, I'm sorry Purrezi, I know you like Karkitty." Terezi sighed.

"Karkat. I'd like to talk to you later. Alone. I'm sorry, I didn't know."

Karkat nodded. "That's okay."

You and Karkat sat down.

"Are you okay Karkitty?" You ask tentatively. He nods, and rubs his temples.

"Yeah. Little headache. I don't want to deal with any of this right now but whatever I guess. I'll deal with Terezi later. But what about you?"

 _Me?_ You think. "W-well I'm alright. I feel bad for Purrezi, and I also kind of made a bet about how long it was going to take fur you to yell at Terezi.. Sorry about that Karkitty.." Karkat simply laughed at that.

"Well then, I guess you've had a decent day then." He laughed, and just acted so _naturally happy_. It made you happy to see. You hugged him, and he leaned in to kiss you. You shudder and push him away. Eyes wide, he asks:

"What was that for?" You stick out your tongue.

"You smell like Terezi's spit." Karkat does not move. He simply sits there, and mutters an _of course.._ You playfully punch his shoulder. You love Karkat. You're absolutely sure of it now. There could never be anyone else. You lay against him, and whisper in his ear:

"Love you." for a scary moment, but then you hear an almost mute response.

"Love you too, even if you are completely ridiculous." You see him smirk and you rest your head on his two sit there for awhile, unbothered by the world.

You think that you could sit there forever, until the ground rumbles, and a bright light sears your eyes and you lose consciousness.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Whoops, looks like I can't say anything bad happened.


	10. A Not-So Strife Battle

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Welcome, friends.  
> Nothing like good old violence, eh?

Be Nepeta

You cannot be Nepeta; you're currently unconscious!

Be Karkat

No time for formalities, you're under attack! The camouflage walls in the vents must have failed, since the transportalizer was off and unused. _Dammit, even though Nepeta, the expert on vents set up the walls, they still found us_? You feel something slam into your chest, and throw you across the room. You hear a _thud_. It was probably you, but at this point, you can't hear or see anything. You struggle to stay awake as the blood rushes to your head, when suddenly one thought pierces your mind: _BLOOD. GET UP OR EVERYONE'S BLOOD WILL BE SPILLED._

Your eyes snap open as you leap up. It's absolute chaos around the room. Nepeta is in the corner, Equius grappling with his bot in front of her, naturally. You have nothing to worry about there. Equius would protect Nepeta to his final breath. Tavros and his parallel bot are using broken lances and basically whacking each other. What's with everyone fighting their bots? There's no point to that, since obviously some people could fight weaker targets and gain the advantage in numbers. Eridan and his buddy were using long knives to try and stab each other, since they knew the consequences of using the Ahab's Crosshairs. However, you knew how desperate one would be that if one of them were to have an advantage.

Gamzee's and Aradia's were sitting down and simply chilling. Of course, neither of them wanted to fight. Both Vriska's were a flurry of explosions and dice. Terezi and her bot were yelling at each other and engaging in a very serious swordfight. Feferi and her bot were sitting in the FUCKING HORN PILE, CHATTING. Seriously, is there no limit to stupidity. God, one day Feferi was going to die because of her bravery. Or naivety. Not that you wanted that to happen. Jegus, that would be terrifying. Sollux was engaging in hand to hand combat, while straining to take over the other's mind. Obviously in these close quarters they would never use their oh-so-powerful psionics. You could not have picked a better place to stay in. Kanaya and her bot have both broken each other's chainsaws and are attacking each other with every step with a speed and ferocity that normally would have terrified you, but you understand now. It was time to **FIGHT.**

All this you notice in a couple seconds. And a good thing too. Karkat-bot is sprinting across the room towards you. He must have been the one who threw you. You crack your knuckles, and wait for him to try and slug you across the face. You counter him and give him a powerful kick to the face. Adrenaline courses through your veins. You give off a vicious snarl and equip your sickle, and slash your opponent across the chest. Too bad he had to die. You could have been friends. You kick him and hurl _him_ across the room. A taste of his own medicine. You grin maniacally. You were getting a bit delirious by now, but you still felt the power flowing through your veins. _Blood,_ you think. _Blood._

You rush towards Karkat-bot to finish him off, when Nepeta-bot drops from the FUCKING CEILING to intercept you. She has no weapons on her but blocks your sickles with her arms. Your sickles imbedded themselves in her arms, and you hear a whimper of pain. All you see when you look at the two is you, lying beaten and Nepeta shielding you. You back away, letting go of your sickles. You snap out of your trance horrified, eyes wide and legs wobbly.

For a moment, the bots look confused. Then, with a blink, Karkat-bot lets out a piercing metallic shriek. He slams his hand down on his wrist, and is engulfed in a blue light. Every other bot begins to glow likewise, and then teleports the hell outta the lab.

You survey the damage around the room. Everyone seems to be fine, only minor bruises and cuts. For a minute, nobody speaks. And everyone collapses. Then, all at once, everyone starts talking. Things like: "How did they find us?" and "What the hell, they can talk?" You look over to Nepeta. She is still out. You walk over, and Equius is waiting for you.

"Well?" You ask. "What are you gonna do about it?" Equius scowls.

"I want to get one thing straight, you are not to harm Nepeta in any way or I will hunt you down. I will not rest until you are eradicated. I don't care about these bots running around. I'll crush you if you dare harm her."

"Well no shit, fuckass. I was expecting that. I meant the secret you know. My fucking blood color. What are you gonna do about it?"

"I do not know what your blood color is. If you are insinuating that Nepeta knows, she has chosen not to let me know. Which is enough for me. I am curious, but I do not care about your blood color as long as you make Nepeta happy."

Nepeta, sit up

You sit up and smile.

"Awe, Equius, that's so sweet of you to say!" You scare the ever-living shit out of Karkat and Equius with this sudden outburst.

"N-nepeta, how long hoove you been awake?" Equius was sweating nervously, and backed up a bit. You grin the sliest of the grins you can.

"Pretty much since Karkitty got here! I heard everything, and don't worry. Karkitty would never hurt me. So I don't want you two fighting, okay?" Karkat and Equius look at each other for a moment, one with slight fear and the other with immense fear. Then, hesitantly, Karkat holds out a hand and Equius shakes it, nearly breaking your matesprits hand.

"I have one question, if you will answer it." Equius says, eyes closed. "Will you allow me to be your auspistice?" You and Karkat look at each other, and silently communicate in a way that only matesprits can. The conversation more or less goes like this:

N: Please?

K: I don't know, I suppose I can't really say no though

N: Yes?

K: Why not.

You and Karkat both shrug. And you grin, because it's so great to have Karkitty as your matesprit. You liked crabby Karkat, but you were starting to love this version of him too. _Hehe, he's just a big softie on the inside,_ you think.

"We don't mind I suppose." Karkat speaks up.

"Thank you very much." Equius bowed. This embarasses you greatly, but you manage to clear your throat and put on a smile. You kiss Karkat on the cheek and tackle-pounce Equius. Karkat laughs a little, and across the room, Sollux gasps. You see as he strides across the room, grabs Karkat by the collar, and lugs him to an empty corner.

"HEY FUCKASS LET GO OF ME."

"2hut up KK, we need to talk." You giggle as Sollux and Karkat start arguing, waving their arms around like crabs and pissing each other off. _Guys are so weird_ , you think.


	11. Chatting

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Trolls have conversations  
> Enjoy~

Be Sollux Captor:

You are now Sollux Captor, the tech-savvy psiionic. And currently you are ripping your friend Karkat a new one. Now may not have been the best time, but really, you didn't give a shit. This was important.

"KK, there ii2 2omethiing I mu2t 2peak two you about. No, iit'2 not about Nepeta, Ii don't really give two 2hiit'2 about that. You can be as happy as you want, ju2t don't overdo iit. What I want to know ii2 how the hell the bot2 found u2." Karkat scowls at you, and barks back.

"Obviously, you fucked up! Those camouflage walls you created were absolutely worthless! They managed to find us and caught us off guard! We could have all died! GOG DAMN IT, SOLLUX. This is all your fault!" You are incredibly offended by this.

"What the hell do you mean thii2 ii2 all my fault? You put u2 iin here, with no way to detect enemiie2, and gave me liimiited tiime to make walls that were to make 2ure we could 2tiil breathe, hiide, and wiith2tand pre22ure. And on top of that, you 2tiill wanted me to help calm down the re2t of u2, whiile I'm tryiing not to fliip my 2hiit. Why don't you, "leader," calm everyone'2 nerve2? I'm the wor2t per2on to piick for thii2 job. Hone2tly, KK, you need to make better decii2iion'2." Your pal Karkat becomes incredibly infuriated at this. You can tell he's about to start shouting, but instead he stops himself. _Hmm?_ You think. _This is unlike him._

"Sollux. If you have a problem with me being your leader, or with the way I lead, then tell me when I'm not in a crisis. We can discuss at a better time. For now, just go get Feferi and have her be the peacemaker." He sounded really tired, and you wonder just how much of an influence Nepeta and Equius have been on him. Your glasses shine in a knowing way as you chuckle.

"2o, Nepeta taught you 2ome manner2." Karkat tenses up.

"Oh shut up!" He whacks you on the back of the head. In turn, you laugh and clap him on the shoulder.

"Congratulatiion2 on actually fiindiing a mate2priite, KK. Maybe 2oon you'll have all your quadrant2 filled up." Karkat squints at you.

"I'm not exactly sure if I should take that as a compliment or an insult. Either way, fuck you, and thank you." You smirk in the cockiest manner you can, which pisses Karkat off to no end. "Jegus, never do that again. You look like the Dave human." You recoil.

"Oh hell no. Don't even compare me to that 2ick creep. He'2 a huge douchebag, and ii2 alway2 accompaniied by tho2e 2tupiid puppet2."

"Then don't look like him." You both begin to argue in your usual way (which does not actually associating feelings of hatred of love-hate), and you begin to waste your time away.

Be Tavros Nitram:

Congratulations, you are now a semi-shell-shocked troll. And at the moment, you are terrified. You kind of wish you were in your recuperacoon, covered in the slime that kept you warm and helped you sleep. Then you wished you could fit into it properly. Then you wished you could stop being so damned worthless. You were scared. And alone. Your bot was so much physically stronger than you, and was fearless. Everyone was so much better and stronger and superior to you. You wished you had some special talent, other than just being really friendly. You slump to the ground by a wall that is more or less away from everyone and begin to think.

_What is it that I can do, to be better? My self-confidence is at an all-time-low... I wish there was something I could do to become better. Rufio, what would you do if you were me? If we could switch roles, how would you be? What would you do?_

Someone taps on your shoulder. You look up to find none other than Nepeta looking at you with a worried look.

"O-oh, hey Nepeta." You try to put on a smile. You fail. Nepeta frowns, and sits down right in front of you.

"Tavros, what's wrong? Mew are usually so upbeat! Did Vrwiskers do something?" You shake your head slowly.

"I'm so inferior to all of you. I'm the weakest and talentless. I thought that, maybe, with these new legs, I could be a little better. But, alas, I am nothing. I got slapped around by my bot. The only thing I was good at was role-playing and role-playing games, but even that is useless now. I've got nothing that can contribute to-"You falter as Nepeta stands up, and sits next to you. You really don't know what to say to that. You _really_ don't know what to say when she softly starts to purr. In fact, you are so surprised, you can't even bring yourself to make a lame and stuttered response. For a moment, Nepeta continues to purr. Slowly the sound fades as Nepeta turns to look at you.

"U-uh... Why did you do that just now?" Nepeta looks at you sympathetically.

"Hearing a cat's purr while in close proximity with low movement can help distress a person. And mew are very, very unhappy. I think that mew know how strong mew really are. Fur someone so weak, mew survived a robot wielding a lance and a fall off a cliff. I think only someone pretty furrocious could do that." You are honestly shocked. You hadn't thought about the things you'd survived.

"But, what good am I to anyone? Pretty much everyone is disgusted with me. Equius hates my blood and lack of strength. You had to convince him to give me legs, remember? Vriska thinks of me as an ant. Karkat hates me. Sollux and Eridan look down on me. Kanaya just feels bad for me. Terezi thinks of me as a punching bag. Aradia doesn't really care about me. Feferi is probably just treating me somewhat nice because she doesn't want to hurt my feelings and ruin the last shred of self-confidence I have. The only people that tolerate me are you and Gamzee." Nepeta looks at you.

"Tavros, I don't tolerate you. You're my friend, and I don't hate you. Karkat doesn't hate you, he's just grouchy. Purrezi is mean to everyone. Vrwhiskers is, and I quote, a huge bitch." At this you raise your eyebrows, but she continues anyway. "Eridan looks down on everyone except Feferi and Karkitty. Aradia is a robot with limited emotion. She literally can't help the fact that she is impassive to you. She's pretty much impassive to everyone except Pawllux. And Pawllux is kind of a mystery to me. Equius- "She lowers her voice considerably- "doesn't really care about the blood caste. He's just saying those things to keep up appearances. And, well, Kanaya is kind of judgemental of everyone. Being the fashion queen, she purrobably thinks she's better than all of us. Mew aren't hated by us. Besides, all of us have our own issues to deal with. I mean, look at Aradia. She's a literal robot!" You both laugh at that a little bit, and then you sigh and slump down. Nepeta can't tell, but you had a little smile on your face. Or so you think.

"Tavros, I'm the rogue of heart. I know you're smiling." You look at her, and grin.

"Sorry." Is your only reply. "I think I need some rest." Nepeta nudges you.

"Don't mew know it. We all need some rest. I think there are some other people who are in need of comfort. Just come talk to me if mew need something, okay? Don't you isolate yourself, silly." You nod happily, and lay down. Soon you feel your body relax considerably, and you sigh contentedly. Not much longer and you've fallen asleep.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It is canon, all homestuck characters hate themselves in some way. Don't blame me, I want to write some angst later.


End file.
